Love

To me the love story of Romeo & Juliet is just a lame… Is it really there is anyone on this real world still having that kind of touchable love story? Or is it me the one don’t understand the meaning of love… don’t know how to love someone…

What is love… I think no one can truly define what love is. Not even an experienced person can truly grasp or explain love to its truest and deepest meaning.Its concepts are just a never ending story of an open book of experiences. But love does lie in one's heart, where memories are but shadows lingering in your soul. Love is giving someone the power to break your heart, but trusting them not to.

“How on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a biological phenomenon as first love?”
— Albert Einstein

It is really very hard to define what love is. Philosophers and psychologists both have attempted to define love, per least its difference from infatuation and lust.

According to wiki… Love is much more than a risk, but is a risk that one can take and grasp and fall into a dark abyss or dig oneself a hole and only crawl back when you overcome your emotions.

So is it love is just an emotional game? Where all your memories goes to… losing yourself…

Can somebody… somebody help me up with this problem… I am really lost…

All The Best

Tomorrow is the beginning of my final exam. Not to say well prepare for it or worst, I just try my best. Wishing all my friends and me myself ALL THE BEST in FINALS.

Anyway I’m here to cheer her up as well. Her luck was never been great and so to her career, always not be smooth throughout all this years. And for me, I feel very sorry cause I can’t help anything much for her besides giving support. Really hope that she can being tough and gone thru all this challenge. It was just the beginning. You can never fail yourself and so to me. I will do well in my exam as well. We can do it.

Both of us must work hard. Stay tough and be patient. Nothings is can’t be succeeded.

And The Most Important… BE HAPPY =)

Trust

A trust in a relation is very important. It’s not just in relation, in family, friends or or anyone you know. Once a people losing their trust on you, it is very hard for you to gain it back. Instead it is very easy for you to make somebody dun trust you. Who will never lies? I bet every single people in this world will lie, just depends on what they lies and how serious on it. Somebody lie for good reason, some lie just to cover their bad or some just lie for nothing. Someone that very close with you, will feel very disappointed on you when you lie on them. They will feel their trust on you is just bullshit. Being threatened in that way. No people will can accept it.

For those who have lie and never felt sorry for what he did…. I bet his life is just full of lies and so to the people around him. Definitely with the fake heart as well. Just to take benefit from you.

For those who have lie and wanna make someone to trust you back. It is definitely not that easy things. But it depends also. For me, I have disappointed my love one before, my family as well.

To my love one, what I did the most wrong is I have disappointed her trust on me, my love towards her, making her phobia that I will flirt to other girls as well. Even though that incident happened in years ago, but till now it is still very hard for her to trust me back. Yet this not the hardest, your patient is the biggest challenge. Everything I do now, I need to explain it very well to her. And is not because she is a controlling GF or what, all this is because of what I have done previously. That’s why once and once again I explain the same things without losing patient. Or else it will become an argument which I hate most. Even is just a small matter, but once I never explain it clearly, or I explain it emotionally it would become very very worst. Anyway I will still go through it without losing patient. I believe one day you will trust me back. I believe I can.

To my family, my studies was the most disappointed things for them. I have wasted one year study on a wrong course. Never study nicely. Always lie, playing truant and going out. Wasting their money. Never plan nicely and don’t even have an aim for my future. Always say I have study, instead I am just playing around. Anyway this have change since this year, I can really slowly gain back their trust towards me. This will do when you have know your wrong and making a change on it.

Never Lies… It will only make things worst… seriously…

Change It All.Coffee-coloured eyes burnt to the back of my brain,
Knowing that nothing will ever be the same.
Lend me your eyes and I’ll change what you’ve seen,
I don’t wish to die without my slate fully clean.
Please, my love, spare me your dreams,
For that recently mine have been tearing the seams.
I filled you with hope; I filled you with lies –
How did you find any truth in my eyes?
For from this heartache you cannot hide,
Go pray to the god that you’ve always denied.
I’ll wrap the shadows around me like a cloak,
As I step away from the noose and watch you choke.
Lend me your eyes and I’ll change what you’ve seen,
I don’t wish to die without my slate fully clean.

 

New Year

Good bye to year 2009 and welcome the all new year 2010. Year 2009 consider a quite meaningful year for me, cause in this year I have choose to start my new life… my new beginning… Many things happened throughout this year and mostly all of them is good, especially the moment of me with her. As for my family, this year not consider a good year, we do have some argument. And mostly I think the main cause is because of their working pressure and house… we are looking for a new house… hopefully we really can get it on this year. So that they can non need stress up with it

My last day of 2009 – Sure I am going to enjoy it as it has brings me a lot a lot of things and the only place that was so happening was clubbing. I thought it was suppose to be fun, but due to many peoples and it was so packed… sweat… it makes me so piss off. And those bitch was so freaking rude. They should know there was so packed and yet they still wanna pushing each other. Anyway at last we still manage to get in to this club Opera. Well this club consider not bad… The environment not bad and the place quite big as well. But the things I don’t like is there is so packed and hot only. Maybe because that day is a big day, so no choice. Clubbing at here have something different is that here do have some opera show… fuiyo… quite special… check this out on the photo I post, it was quite like those china opera show. LOL

‘Please Don’t Stop The Music… Music…’ I was dancing non stop inside the club with my cousin and my girlfriends as well. It was so so nice when dancing… shaking your body your head and drink… forget about everything and just enjoy. Haha… but yet it will still come to the limit when you are tired. LOL.  Drink Dance Shake Drunk Drink Dance… just continue doing so… and wishing each other happy new year.

Club until around 3 something… I was really very tired and can’t continue anymore. So we decided to back. On the way walking to car park, all around the people we saw is either drunk, dancing or celebrating at there. I was thinking the night is still young man. LOL. And one terrible incident we saw at that night was a car accident inside the car park. I guess the driver is drunk. Even inside the car park he can knocked on the wall, and the girl on the passenger seat bang on the windscreen… and her face was just full of blood and some glass pieces striking on her face. Yucks… it was just looks like Final Destination. It was just a nightmare to them I guess. Sometimes I think no matter how you enjoy the night there is still a limit… don’t be too over as it will bring sadness.

Here is our picture we shoot on that day…

View Full Album

WELCOME THE ALL NEW YEAR 2010 AS I WILL MAKE THIS YEAR MORE COLOURFUL THAN LAST YEAR.

BRING IT ON

After Christmas

So fast the Christmas is over and New Year is coming and yet my finals is coming soon too… a bit worry. Hmm… holiday makes my heart becomes can’t get back the heart to concentrate in study. Thinking to start but all those celebration makes me a reason to continue my holiday. So end up having my celebration without preparing for finals. Cannot be… I should start my revision now… must must must…

Besides… this few day my heart is just so missing her cause she has went back to hometown after Christmas on Saturday and back on Monday. What make us get connected is the phone only. Can’t even chat thru MSN cause her connection there is down. Many many things haven get the chance to tell you lo… About my friends birthday party… about my problems now… about my New Year celebration with you and my shirt… I want to buy and wear it on the New Year with my new long pants as well…

IT’S TIME TO WAKE UP… COME ON… I MUST MAKE IT…

Christmas Celebration

On Thursday night, it was Christmas eve...
As what we have promised,
we must dress up nicely on that day and have our best shoot
hehe... I was very excited on what she will be wearing.
I was a bit surprise when I saw her... guess what... she draw her eyes...
haha...
It was the first time she make up tat way.
Normally you will just put some pure make up on it... and now you even draw your eyes...
Maybe you just want to show the most pretty side of yours to me
hehe...
Actually I think you no draw your eyes is better, only those who is not pretty need to put more effort on make up to cover their ugliness... haha...
Pure make up is already enough.
Definitely we get to shoot many picture on that day,
we shoot at The Curve, when having dinner at Sakae Sushi, and Tony Romas and yet join my cousin at Telawi Bistro at around 12 something. And  this is what we get…

 

View Full Album

That day we do really have a memorable day… and do have some argument… cause of her getting emotion when can’t get to shoot nice picture… haha… lol… Actually me also a bit emotion due to the environment there is too hot. At last the war is taken down by me… With my very funny acting making her to smile back.

On Christmas day… I slept until 1 something only wake up… cause yesterday night too late only get to sleep. Erm… Yesterday wasn’t a good night… cause she can’t get to sleep well. She was thinking that wanted to get away from me… don’t ever wanted to look at me suffer of being with her… I was very sorry… maybe what I have done making her feel I very not happy being with her. But seriously, I was just too emotion and doesn’t mean you making me that way. Is my own problem that I should work on it and be a better man. All this I just get to know when I was chatting with her thru msn when i wake up.

Anyway, that’s just a small obstacles that block us. It never makes our mood down on today. We out at around 6. Then we head towards One Utama. Thought of getting my shirt at there. But too pity, it has no my size. So we just get to have our dinner at there and movie. Since long time we seldom shoot picture, on this Christmas we must shoot as much picture as we can even when having dinner. Hehe… here is the picture we shoot at Italianise.

View Full Album

Lol… overall she was not satisfy with the picture we shoot on this Christmas. To me is still ok la… Important is the memory we shoot and not about how pretty you inside the picture what. And one things very funny… the way she shoot picture on that day like terkejut…haha…=P

IT WAS THE MOST MEMORABLE CHRISTMAS TO ME. I LOVE YOU MY BELOVED.

Missing You

Bibi a bibi...
so miss you
yo... if you not going back hometown I think now I suppose hanging out with you
can go shopping with you
watch movie
dinner
holding your hand
hug hug you
So miss you la
faster come back la
can't wait going out with you again... =)

Badminton

Having badminton with my friends today...
Deng... I don't even think that I will lose to my those noob friends...
LOL... haha... (actually not so noob la... just joking)
I think me the one become so noob already
Long time no play... sure will a bit cacat one lo...lol
so many mistake I have made...
and my muscle... whole body pain due to long term lack of exercise...
I must exercise more...
Plan to go gym with my BiBi next time
Anyway me and my friends do have fun on it
Instead of spending the time on cyber cafe playing Dota... exercise is better.

Math Test

Holy shit...
Today I have my math test and I only know how to do 2 question out of 4...
2 question which I'm sure on it
1 question which I not sure
and yet 1 question don't even know what's the formula to apply on...=/
Doink Doink @.@
Must work even harder to get it all right!!!
Coming up next is Thermo test on next Sat...
I think should be no problem on it...
Wish me luck

Halloween Night

Planning to celebrate Halloween night at Redbox with my bibi
so around 9 somethings we reach The curve
After dinner at Kim Gary and head forward to Redbox
and who knows that place is fully booked...lol
so end up watching movie
Anyway the curve that street is so happening
but that's just for clubber
ME NOT...haha...=P
Hmm... not bad la... even that late we still manage to get a couple seat for Phobia 2
This is a combine ghost story movie...
Wow...i like this movie...especially the ending
Damn funny
never watch any ghost movie that have this kind of ending before...lol

Course Fee

Once again i need to ask my dad 2 pay 4 my college fees again...
and once again I have an uncomfortable feeling...sad...worry...or is it stress...
but 1 things 4 sure is that I will sure kena insult... insult for always playing computer and no study... going out and bla bla...
even I'm doing my part...
out once a week or twice and definitely not more than that....
getting back home at 6pm after studying at college and asking me go study more and not facing computer...
zzz....all this rubbish i just hear more than once in a month...
and it use 2 be my habit 2 ignore it...
However, I really don't like that very much!!!
In my mind... everyday I am hoping that I can graduate faster...
and start my career...
Stop depending on my parents...
I hate depending on them...
I hate the feeling
cause when u depends on someone...
You have no no right to say anythings...
You have no freedom...
You have no choice but 2 follow what they say even is wrong
and one more things is... when you depends on them... that's the biggest weakness point of you 2 them...
they might use this to insult you whenever you have an argument with them... cause you have nothing to say on it... and you have to agree what they say and do exactly what they say.
I HATE THAT...
who will like letting people holding up your weakness point
NOBODY

Help! Help! Help!
Asking for help... Useless
What to do???
I have just did many bad things previously that's make them disappointed on me
no more trusted on me
ONLY ME MYSELF
can help myself now
I must work even harder now
study with heart
aiming for A's and not pass
and for this final year...
I'm going
To show them To proof to them...
I'm no longer the previous me
PLEASE DON'T INSULT ME ANYMORE...

To My Dearest

Sorry bibi
this week i can't really out with you on this week due to my family problem...
I m now really have no choice but 2 accept what my parents say...
4 my parents...even you are wrong i will accept it also...coz no matter how you are, you are still my parents...
4 myself...i need not follow their step...i can differentiate what is right and what is wrong...i need to become even better...especially my attitude...i should make a change on it so that i will not disappointed my love 1....
and 4 my sis...hope you all will not follow the way like how our parents do...tat is not a good attitude 2 follow....

Family Problem

"Dad, you just know how 2 say only la..."
just depend on this word it doesn't sounds like an offensive word...
but when you add in more point 2 hold your right...
it make the things even worst....

What makes me say tat...
just because i trying 2 complain that my parents always say such insulting words...
and is it there is no right 2 complain about your parents...maybe it is true
NO matter whats your parents attitude is...
you have no choice but 2 accept them
"From the moment I born you out...you have no right to judge what kind of attitude I have but 2 accept it...
how suffer they raise you up...
I can even choose to destroy you when you inside my stomach...
you are consider lucky because I have let you appear to this world...
and yet you all are still not sastify with it and yet still wan to say your parents...
how would happened if those children who raise up in a problematic family...
did them voice out anythings about their parents...they wouldn't you know...
YOU ARE CONSIDER LUCKY..."
saying to my dad "Don't be crazy la...listen to what your son's say.."


All their mind set is they born you...and you as a son you have no right 2 judge them...
and did they know...why there is many son or daughter who hate their mom 4ever...
did they know why...
why those children will have no choice but 2 follow their bad daddy or mommy
coz they have no choice...they can't fight 4 themselves...
but in the future... will they appreciate their parents...they wouldn't
is not bcoz they dun appreciate their parents...
is bcoz their parents did somethings tat can't be forgiven

Compare to others definitely my parents not tat worst...
is just i feel my mom is tat type tat wouldn't listen 2 others...
it is not juz oni me...among my family...my dad even relatives or who else... she will bcoz of small matter argue until a big serious problems...

I don't know is it rite 2 say them
but definitely that day i m not trying 2 say them but discuss about their attitude...
definitely all parents definitely will say their children...
but is it rite 4 a parents 2 say their son in an insulting way...
look down on them...saying them stupid...
i am not comparing with others family...but insulting is not a good attitude...
what way should i use 2 communicate wit our parents
is it in their eyes we are still consider a kid 4 them
why everything i do they also wan say about...just 4 car using...i juz use it once or twice a week...is it consider over?
why they wan always dun let me do tat do this, ask me do tat do this...
why everytimes a son fight back 4 their right is definitely wrong...

maybe i should not mind on what my parents saying...
maybe the way they express their care is just in a wrong way
what they want 2 tell is hope i dun always like tat
but maybe they just 2 mind
in their mind
they just think i m stil a child...
in future i will not say them anymore
but 2 keep quiet
i know how hard they raise me up
we as a child we just like their heavy stone...we giving them more stresses but still didn't do anythings support them and yet still complain about them...
thinking on the other way round...
i think i really did somethings wrong...
Hope my parents will forgive me...

Nose Facial

Getting overnight at my BiBi house that day, cause tomorrow will be her day to got for interview at somewhere around PJ Old Town for her new job. Going to accompany her for the interview at early of the morning. Giving her some support. And for sure she make it. all things going smooth and the interviewer quite sastify with her portfolio, and a bit shock too. Cause getting to know that what she previouly doing in her company is quite a big project. So she give herself 9 out of 10 marks for her that day performace. Even me too. I do help her arrange up her portfolio sure i confident on it.... haha... =P

Later on we go and have a lunch with her sister while getting her sister back also... working half day cause her sis is seriouly sick... fever yet flu... but not as serious as H1N1 la... lol... So after lunch we back. Thought wanna go for singing k but because yesterday too late sleep, tired end up having a afternoon nap at her house. Guess wha... not really fall asleep... but go for a nose facial.. haha... she help me do... saying my nose have many blackheads... actually is i ask for it also... haha... cause can't get to sleep.

When doing nose facial, we shoot many of our funny picture
Za Dao


Burst mode



=@



=)



^^



Couple shirt


We having a great day that day... doing many things together... knowing each other better... and the time past so fast... but the moment we use to be together... will remain inside our memory... our heart... hehe... =)

Perhaps I Think Too Much

Yesterday night can't really sleep well
knowing somethings that I haven't settle
I m not avoiding from the problem...
just dun wanna simply think so much on it
cause I realize is me myself who making out the pressure on me...
getting know you i getting know myself more...
getting to give myself an aim...
getting to give myself an expectation
And is not you who high expectation
but me....
Wanna give you the best...
feeling stress on it...

Every human do have pressure
I am pretty sure
Pressure can come in different way
maybe in relation, working
or his or her the other part
family, friends and others
And this kind of pressure will never end until the end of your life
But it just depends on how one's going to release all this pressure
Some may chose to avoid
that's the last time me
but now I'm not.

I would rather think rationale
thinking the main cause of this pressure
As for yesterday I know it would be mine problem
That's why i need time to think through myself clearly...
instead of letting this pressure driven me emotional...
turning me into a FUCKING IDIOT

SHOPAHOLICS

Is it compulsory for every girls to become a SHOPAHOLICS???
Is it compulsory that every girls should love shopping???
Is it compulsory that every girls should spend more time in shopping???
Is it compulsory that every girls should waste money on shopping???
Is it that's the only hobbies that girl's have???

Even they know they doesn't have sufficient money
but still wanna go shopping for it
sometimes spend until over their limit
is it that's the future you girls wanna have???
getting can't save any money until the end of life???
or depends on guy
giving you a no credit limit credit card to use as you want
sponsor you all the way???
is it that's the happiness is what's a girl want
if YES
then sorry
I have not that capable enough to give what you want...

IS ALL MONEY MATTER???

Really don't understand girl
is it their image is that so important
everyday just wanna be fashionable
be more attractive
is it this is a habit that assist when born???
because of wanna getting a better image
don't even care about their financial problem???
SO SICK OF IT

So Good Boy Me

Now staying at house with my 2 little small sister
playing monopoly
why no going out with my girl
haha....
maybe because feel tired gua... and the weather outside so damn Hot
don't feel like wanna out
so at last she choose to go out with her sister
going One Utama
and me going no where
sleep maybe
actually I hope to go out with her also
but a bit worry that my mom mumble me for no taking care of my 2 small sister and going out with no responsible as an elder brother
another things is tonight me and my family going out for dinner
celebrating mother's day
hehe... I get a Dorothy Perkins bag for my mom
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY

And BiBi
if me choose to go out with you
then tonight the family dinner will not be family dinner anymore
and not even mother's day
mmm....
maybe tomorrow... I will go out with you oO

At My BiBi House

Well....erm as usual right now I'm at her house...plan to watch movie...but not now cause shhh... I found out some secret of her...and this secret is there is many photo of her i have never saw before
and some of this is what we took last week when we went for shopping
so when the time she not around
I using her computer to upload all this photo
haha...=P
and this the most pretty one among of all

haha...

sure yet there is other photo also

All this we shoot before we went to The Garden shopping
in the car
using her new bought handphone to shoot

That day we do go The Garden Red Box Karaoke
But not much photo we shoot
haha...
cause the lighting there not so so nice
and she keep on say this one not nice that and these
so until the end we get none zero photo at the Red Box
Haihz.... girl is like that... so mind about their image

Only manage to get mine the one shooting only....lol

Talk Somethings Wrong

Yesterday when going to sleep
I realize one things
realize that yesterday when you fetch me to Mid Valley
met up with a bad temper taxi driver
i should not ask you to go faster cross over him
HOW COME YOU SO SLOW!!!
I should talk somethings positive instead of negative making you more tension
I should tell you not to care
not to bother
or talk somethings positive and support you
SORRY if get to hurt you BiBi...

After Four Days Of Holiday

Don't feel like go work a....
getting bored with my working life maybe holiday too much
make myself even lazy
in the other way round thinking
even i didn't go to work
i don't have anythings else to do at house
instead of staying at house
better stay at office
yet can get money
IT'S TIME TO GO!!!